At a certain stage of your life, you’re vulnerable to rejection. Especially in one or more of these instances:
- Romantic relationship
- Workplace employment with promotional opportunities
- LGBTQs encountering biased attitudes and conduct
Rejection often hurts initially. It’s what you do with it next that determines how it will affect you.
Feeling bad is the result of natural human chemical reactions inside you. They’re your chemicals, and because of that, you can ultimately gain control.
Positive Lifestyle Actions
Before you get into a situation that could lead to rejection, remember the sports adage that the best defense is a good offense.
Develop a lifestyle that minimizes the effects of rejection, such as:
- Exercise—Physical activity stimulates dopamine, a brain chemical that boosts your self-image.
- Meditate—This relaxes and slows your mind, improving your mood.
- Avoid Addictions—Alcohol, drugs and excessively-caffeinated beverages all upset your reward circuitry.
- Declutter—Reducing stuff in your home lifts your self-esteem and reduces anxiety.
- Assess Strengths and Weaknesses—An inventory of these traits builds confidence and pride.
- Grow Support Network—Assembling a social network of family and friends—and being authentic with them—provides encouragement when you need it most.
- Keep Gratitude Diary—Logging big and small grateful events ignites optimistic vibes.
Once rejection occurs, there’s still a lot more you can do to deal with it.
Remember, it’s emotional pain. There’s no need to attach extra baggage or any meaning to it whatsoever.
Rather than avoiding the pain, confront it and see what messages this gives you. Your mind may wander, but gently bring it back to the pain to see if you can discern the messages. Many times, these messages may actually be the source of your emotional pain.
Ignoring the pain isn’t the answer. It could come back to haunt you later on.
Many times people who are rejected will compare and contrast themselves with the person who is rejecting them. Individuals being rejected tend to:
- Focus on their own inadequacies, but not those of the rejector.
- Fail to see the similarities between themselves and the person rejecting them.
The best rule is to judge yourself by your own standards and progress. Also, remember to be thankful. This really shoots up your dopamine levels.
If you think you’ve made a mistake, try to get some objective feedback from someone close to you. Use rejection as a learning opportunity.
No one’s perfect. Try to understand why things didn’t go the way you wanted.
Recognize that others have gone through what you’ve experienced and just not survived—but later thrived. Get back in the saddle as soon as possible.
Look to the future with hope and promise.